Texas here we come!

So we got the official news on Friday that we are indeed moving to Texas! We are leaving March 30th and hoping to get there either the 31st or April 1st!!! We are all so exciting and have been celebrating ever since we got the official news. It was so stressful not knowing for sure so now it feels so ice that we can move! We've even started packing already which is crazy but we've been able to throw out a lot of stuff as well. The exciting part is we threw out a lot of the baby stuff so hopefully we do get pregnant again and I can start all of that shopping again!!

Naughty blogger! Sorry for not posting in awhile!

Well I sure have been a naughty little blogger! Not much really to report. We're hoping to get confirmation on whether or not J's relocation has been approved. If it has then we think we would be gone within the next 3 months at the latest! We've found a couple houses to rent for the first year unit we truely know the area then we'll purchase a home for ourselves. Keeping everything crossed that it gets approved! We ordered some boxes and plan to start packing ASAP so lets hope we get to move! I have an appointment on Wednesday for blood work so that I can be prescribed some Provera since I haven't ovulated and it's been almost 30 days since the d&c. I'm anxious to start trying again and hope that we could even be pregnant before we move, wishful thinking!

I hate what ttc has done to me!!

Ok so I have been so freaking good at not becoming obsessed again with ttc #2. It almost seems bizarre that it's not consuming me but I'm at peace with it right now and we agreed to take my first cycle off after the d&c anyways. Well J calls me this morning from work to let me know that his boss won't be coming in today because there's a chance that him and his wife may be having their baby today. When he told me that I felt angry and I hate feeling this way. I just want our family to have a new addition and I'm so jealous of anyone who's pregnant or just had a baby. I don't want J to think I'm a major B so I don't want to press on the subject so I figured this was a good outlet for me. I hate what ttc for so long has done to me. I just want to be happy for others but it's so damn hard when they have what I so desperately want! Anyways, J's boss and his bosses boss discussed the possibility of us relocating and so far those two are on board. They just want J to train a new hire before he goes but they said that of it gets the final approval then it would be within the next 6 months. So the next step is getting J's bosses bosses boss, lol, to approve it and then it's a done deal! I hope it happens soon because we really want to move the heck out of dodge. Now we're contemplating whether or not we want to rent for 6 months when we first get there or if we just want to jump into it and purchase a house. That would def involve us putting some blind faith in the realtor to find us a family friendly and safe neighborhood in a good school district. Well last night I skipped my workout but I fell asleep at like 8:30pm! I was exhausted! So tonight I want to work out a little longer to make up for my naughtiness, lol. Still keeping up with the healthy meals and even though the scale isn't saying I'm losing weight I do feel thinner. Maybe it's in my head but it has been a week so I guess I could have lost an inch or so.

Relocating??

Well this weekend flew by!! Didn't do much except work out and grocery shop but it was very relaxing to stay in the majority of the weekend. I've been working out with the your shape pretty much every night and I feel so good by doing it! I also downloaded an ap called your fitness pal and it keeps track my calories in and calories burned which makes everything a bit easier. There's also a good chance that my family will be relocating to Texas because J's company also has an office out there and Texas is where he grew up so it would be nice to go back. The cost of living is so much cheaper out there then here in northern Virginia so we could accord a lot more out there as well. J's company higher ups are discussing it now and I'm so nervous because I just want them to approve it. Plus it's a great opportunity to get as far away as possible from my bat shit crazy mother. She's always been emotionally abusive so I'm not being a big B by saying I want to get far away! Anywho...I've got to get back to cleaning up around here! I'll obviously be updating this when we find out what decision J's company is leaning towards.

Your Shape ROCKS!

Ok so yesterday I didn't post because during m. Free time instead of being on my iPad I decided to try out the Your Shape for Kinect game that J brought home the other night. Well today I can't flipping move I am so sore!! I burned over 100 calories so far and it's a pretty intense workout. Today I'm planning on taking a break however if I feel better tonight I may just do some yoga or something else that's less intense. Yesterday for dinner was my first time making chicken salad at home, usually I only eat it if I'm at a sandwich shop or something, but it was delicious! I'm eating it for lunch today and I hope it's just as good. Even A enjoyed it and finished her plate. Todays plans involve relaxing and doing more "homework" with A and do something more stationary like puzzles instead of running around. Hope you all have a great Friday!! I probably won't post this weekend but I'll catch you up on anything new on Monday!

97.3, that was my temp this morning. Still pre o which is fine...for now. I'm super proud of myself for sticking with my new excersize routine this morning yet again even though I woke up super sore from yesterday! So this morning I had my coffee, made dd her breakfast, worked out, brushed and dressed dd, then did the same for myself, supervised dd making her bed and then made my own. Dd and I have been building towers with Legos and then being pretend bakers making play-doh cakes along with doing 8 pages of "homework" with dd for her to practice writing letters and numbers and recognizing colors etc. dd just finished a snack consisting of strawberry yogurt and sliced bananas. Now it's time for cleaning up a bit before preparing lunch and playing more with dd. last night I was "naughty" and had dh pick up dinner...I know so bad! But I will be cooking the turkey chili tonight for dinner. I have to say I feel so good with incorporating an excersize routine into my day! I have so much more energy to play and do chores.

A new day

Well I pulled out my basal body term and actually took my temp this morning! I'm so proud of myself, lol. 97.1 so I'm hoping I ovulate soon!!! I also managed to start my excersize routine this morning and now my arms and legs feel like jello but in a good way. I hope to keep up with it so I can tone up and have a rockin body come bathing suit season. I just want to change in a good way for this year and if a baby happens to be one of the changes then I'll be so flipping happy! Today's check list: Take temp (check) Work out (check) Play with Addi (check) Make lunch Do some work book pages with Addi Make a craft with Addi Sew on a button for Addi's pillow Play again Prepare dinner Clean up the house before Jason gets here Let's see if I can finish off my check list for the day!

Well again I find myself apologizing for being MIA for 4 days! Thursday I decided to do an tech free day as much as possible with my daughter. She's becoming a but hooked on gadgets lately so I want to break the habit. It was a fun day though. "A" had school in the morning and then when I went to pick her up we came home and made a nice lunch and did a couple pages out of her workbook so she can be extra prepared for kindergarten in a year and a half and we spent the rest of the day coloring and playing make believe with some of her other toys. Friday the couch, chairs and side/coffee tables came. They look amazing and I couldn't be happier with them! We do need to replace one of the chairs though because one has a little tear in it so the replacement will be here on Saturday which is no biggie. Saturday we did nothing but relax and enjoy the furniture. We all had mimosas and of course "A" had a virgin mimosa, aka orange juice with a couple berries in it to make it look fancy. Sunday we went out for lunch and and stopped by J Crew, my drug of choice, lol. I got one sweater, a pair of pants and shoes. The actual store didn't have my size in pants and they didn't carry the shoes I wanted to I ordered those. I'm really hoping the shoes are what I'm expecting of them. They're very bright which is something very different then what I normally choose so I hope they're great otherwise I'll exchange them for a more neutral color. I felt so guilty leaving though spending over $300 on one outfit. We have the money so that's not the problem at all it's just I always feel guilty buying things for myself. I always think of all the other things I could have bought for "J" or "A". Well today I'm going to practice hemming a pair of shorts that are way too big before I attempt a nice pair of jeans. Hopefully it works out. Oh and before I completely forget, my nurse emailed me Saturday and my beta is completely negative. I'm relieved and hope we can start trying again immediately. I haven't been temping so I need to dig that out and get to it! I need to make sure I don't have another annovulatory cycle after the d&c. Also while I was trying on clothes I realized I need to tone up big time so I've decided to start an excersize routine this week, wish me luck!

Happy Hump Day

Well it's Wednesday! Only two more days until my living room furniture is here!! I'm super excited.

Last night was a good one for Jason and I. He came home to a clean house which always makes me happy and a crock pot dinner so the whole house smelled wonderful! We had pot roast and mashed potatoes, yummy. Tonight Jason will be doing the majority of the cooking which is burgers and I'll make baked french fries. I'm getting hungry just thinking about it, lol. Addison was in a good mood yesterday so when she finished dinner we pulled out the ice cream maker and made vanilla ice cream with chopped kit Kat bars inside.

When Addi went to bed Jason and I cleaned up after dinner and went upstairs and had some fun of our own. I forgot how much fun sex is when there's no pressure added to it. I'm actually starting to feel excited to start ttc again though. When we were trying on our own before we would get pregnant within 3 months so I don't think that's our problem however I just hope we win the jackpot so to speak and get a healthy egg the cycle we do get pregnant on. Losses are just too unbearable to continue to go through but I will not give up until our family is complete.

Jason and I have always agreed on wanting three children but the other day he told me that if our second is a boy then we should really think about stopping at two because he doesn't want to continually see me go through losses. I'm not really sure what to think about that. I told him that after the second I wouldn't want to stop trying for the third and maybe do a not try but bot prevent approach for the first year. It's just hard because I've always had a picture of what our family would look like and I hate the thought of "deleting" a child from the picture. I guess I just need to focus on conceiving the second child and see how our family feels at that point and have a heart to heart with Jason when the time comes.

A catch up post from the weekend

First a quick apology for no posts over the holiday weekend.

First on Saturday we went over to my mothers house so that my daughter could play with some of her cousins but the tension was too much because my mother and I are currently not speaking, it's a very long story but to get the gist of it she shows me zero respect and has diarrhea of the mouth and I'm tired of it. Growing up she wasn't the best mother and I spent most of my time at my grandparents house so this is nothing new except for the fact that I've realized I'm old enough to decide who I allow in my life but I'm struggling on if I cut her off completely from my daughter as well because I don't want her to hurt her like she's hurt me over and over again. Anyways, Addison, my daughter had a blast playing with her cousins so it was worth the trip over there. Jason, my husband, and I came so close to actually staying up till midnight but it was a bust and we passed out at like 11:30-11:45pm ish. I woke up just after midnight because people were lighting fireworks outside and it scared the crap out of me, lol.

Sunday Jason took the Christmas tree down which I was ready to see go. We also decided that we were going to get new living room furniture that day because our sectional that we currently have has a tear in it and the pillows are just sagging too much and it drives me nutty! It's a pottery barn sectional which I over paid for so I def learned my lesson that there stuff is not made for quality. Anyways,we went out to Haverty's and bought a leather sofa, two cloth upholstered chairs, two side tables and a coffee table. The couch is def more of a modern style which isn't something I typically go for but in the store it looked so pretty and Jason loves a more modern style anyways so it was a good fit for us both, plus the two side chairs really even it out between modern and traditional. The furniture won't be here until Friday but I'll take a picture and post it when it arrives so I can get your opinions on it. Also, that night Jason and I had sex for the first time since my d&c so I'm healed and ready to start ttc again. I'm unsure if I want to wait until a have one normal period before we officially start trying or if I should go for it this cycle. I still need to start temping soon so that I don't have an annovulatory cycle like I did with my last d&c.

Monday Jason had off of work so we had a next breakfast at home and then relaxed all morning. We went to chipotle for lunch because we've both been craving it for two weeks now and we had to go to target anyways and they're right next to each other. While at target I got my first sewing machine. I'm crazy because I want to make our own curtains to match our new furniture when it arrives. We went to the fabric store afterwards and they had really nice Ralph Lauren fabric but I'm not going to start with the curtains so I got a cute fabric that matches Addison's room and I made her a little throw pillow for her bed. I need to go out and buy a button to button it shut but over all it looks really good and once the button is on I'll post a pick of that as well. Addison loves the pillow already and slept with it last night so I was happy. I do need new thread because we bought a starter kit and the thread in that was HORRIBLE and kept breaking on me so I was getting frustrated with constantly having to re-thread the machine. I need to find another "easy" project to do before I move to curtains and throw pillows for our new couch.

As for today, I need to catch up on some major cleaning! My house is disgusting from my lack of effort lately. I was in a real funk after this lost but I think I'm snapping out of it. It sucks and that won't change but I can at least focus on other things besides something I can't change. Since we're going to be ttc again I was thinking about going out and getting some sexy bras and panties to surprise Jason with to make things fun again since there's nothing fun or sexy with IVF.any suggestions on where to get some sexy things please let me know.

So that's all folks, I'm all caught up now. I think the weekends will be hard for me to post but I'll try my hardest. Also for now I might have more random posts like today's since I'm in limbo land after the d&c.